Deciding Harry's Future
by Poseida Lunar
Summary: The day before their death, Lily and James decided to decide their son's future... Mentions of HPDM. Make no sense. oh, I almost forgot Veela!Harry... or somewhat along that line.


**Disclaimer:** Sadly, I don't own Harry Potter or anything related to it. I only own this idea, which I think that Jk Rowling would highly disapprove.

**A/N:** OK, I just thought of this idea when I was reading yet another one of those highly cliche Veela stories involving Harry and Draco. So this plot bunny just popped up in my brain. No offense to anyone who likes cliche, and hope all of you got a good laugh out of this. ;)

* * *

**DECIDING HARRY POTTER'S FUTURE**

* * *

"No, no, no!!" Lily Potter shouted, slamming her hand down onto the table once again as she looked at her husband with a glare. "That's... that's... NOT DONE!! Who ever heard of such ridiculous idea? Where did you get that from? Sirius?!"

James sat up straighter in his armchair. "It's original," he declared with a stubborn look on his face.

"I will not permit my son to die in a TOILET BOWL as a MIDGET!!" she shouted, her fist shaking violently. "He is to duel Voldemort and live as everybody's hero!!"

"How cliche," James said with a sigh.

"He is to in heir his Veela features when he's of age at seventeen!" she went on. "AFTER he defeated the Dark Lord in a grand, HONORABLE duel! And then he is to be returned to Hogwarts, where he will find his mate-"

"I'll bet my life on Draco Malfoy."

"-DRACO MALFOY!!" she screeched. "Because it was only proper that he would fall in love with someone he hates. Of course, he would resist, but slowly, they will fall in love with the help of Severus, who shall be their potion master. I shall also expect them to share the same bedroom, where lust would be so strong that they can't deny the need to fu-"

"This is rated K plus," James reminded her.

"Oh, oh yeah. Excuse me... But why is it rate it K plus? I can't talk about them having se-"

"IT'S K PLUS!!"

"S'cuse me, LEMON, if it's rate K plus?"

Her husband sighed. "You know what? I'll decide Harry's life for him, because obviously, you're not doing that great of a job here."

"Su CUSE me Mister!" she slurred. "I happen to be his mother. You know? The one who is suppose to sacrifice herself in order to save his life-"

"Another one of those incredibly cliche moment that happens in every single book," James interrupted, a bored look on his face. As expected from Lily the Great Cliche-Making Mistress. Today is the day that they are to plan their son's future. It was the day before the day that they were suppose to die.

Another cliche idea from Lily. James thought with a snort. What difference does it make if they decide Harry's fate on a Friday? Why must it be a Saturday? And why must October 31st be a Sunday? Some one set this whole thing up, he just knew it.

"As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted," she scowled, "we need to go now to discuss this whole thing with the Malfoys so-"

"It's ten O' clock at night."

Her scowl darkened. They can't go tomorrow, they have to die tomorrow. "Maybe I should leave them a note," she muttered.

"Have I ever told you that YOU ARE INSANE?!" James shouted.

"You told me last night when we were going to bed," she said as she got a piece of parchment paper and scribbled her note onto it. She called over her owl and handed it to the bird. "I shall also write a note to Hagrid about getting him a snowy white owl. And of course, I have to tell Dumbledore about sending him over to my sister after we die."

"We are about to die," James pointed out. "And you are just talking plain insane."

"I know that. But it's for the sake of Harry. If we are all sane, normal folks, who will ever read his story?"

"You know? I don't think that he needs to be a Veela. Being a hero at the age of one is quite enough for him."

"But it'll just make his life even more glamorous. Look! I even decided when he will be doing to patronus charm!" she said. "And his patronus will be a stag! Just like yours!"

"Do you know just how cliche that is?? Do you realize how embarrassing it will be for me?? Who won't predict that? The reason that you're insane is because you're too predictable! What will you decide next? Him being the smartest, the cleverest student in the school?"

"Acutally, I was thinking of Quidditch. You know, that might be a good explanation on why he is to acquire such amazing body that Draco Malfoy will just drool over."

"Mother of God, save me."

"And of course, by the time that he acquired his Veela features, I was also thinking of adding a snow white snake, the ones that was incredibly deadly. And perhaps I should also give Harry the ability to communicate with unicorns."

James covered his mouth with his hand. "I vote on the toilet bowl idea. Harry shouldn't suffer through all of this."

"Draco and Harry will be the perfect pairing! Dark and light, ying and yang! People will love them!" Then, "...Do you think that Harry should grow his hair out so he could braid it into a pig tail? That will be so kinky! You know, the way that Draco could just pull him by the pigtail and-" gasp. "They share a fierce kiss! Or maybe it should be gentle. I don't know which. Oh, I've got to write to the Malfoys on that one!"

"Authoress, put the rating up to a T please?"

Lily suddenly paused, her eyes widened. James looked at her and groaned, knowing that look all too well. It was the look when she got another one of those idea so cliche that your teeth will just gnaw with frustration at it.

"Addition to the pigtail, I think that I should also added two wings. Angel wings!" Her widened eyes lit up with excitement. "What do you think? Black wings or white wings?"

James gave no answer.

"Oh fine, I'll go with black. I've got to write to Albus and the Malfoys about this, again, along with all those other ideas. Maybe I should tell Sirius about that plan. There could even be a side pairing of Severus slash Sirius! Or Remus slash Sirius! Or Severus slash Remus! Or even better, all three of them together. Or Harry and Draco could set them up together!"

James turned slightly green at the thought. "Put the rating up to M."

"And let's not forget that they could shag under your invisible cloak in the corridors. And in the Room of Requirement!"

"...My invisible cloak?" He'll never look at his cloak the same way again.

Lily snapped her finger. "That's it! I've finally put together the perfect life for our little Harry! Oh he's going to be so pleased!"

"Bless my dear soul that I'm about to die tomorrow."

* * *

Unfortunately for Lily and fortunately for James, she scribbled the address too quickly, or maybe the owl was just old and misread it, the letters did not end up at either the Malfoy's or Albus Dumbledore's hands.

It instead, landed at the front door step of a young Muggle woman with the last name of Rowling, who later in her motherhood, rewrote Harry's life for Lily. She took out most of the cliche-ness, but some imprints of Lily's creations and ideas still thrived today even after her death...

...in the mind of us fan fiction writers.

* * *

OK, this made no sense. It's not even that funny, but oh well...


End file.
